Sweet Seasons

5 Reasons Why Hotels are the Worst

Hotels are just the worst!

I would say our family stays in hotels more than the average bear. We enjoy taking the kids to new places and back to favorite old spots.  We enjoy a night away without kids on the rare occasion and work travel is part of the husband’s job description. I can’t speak for the venue husband stays at when he travels, but when we travel together, skimping on a hotel is not something we do. We like a little pampering and luxe and our hotel choices tend to fall in line as such. However, as of late (maybe it’s just a bad run) I have decided hotels are the worst. Maybe like Danny Glover said in Lethal Weapon, “I’m too old for this shtuff,” but here are the five reasons hotels are the WORST!

1. The Noise, the noise, the noise, noise, noise:

If I only had one reason hotels are the worst, it would be this: WHHHHHHhhyy are people so loud in hotel hallways? Recently, I was awakened at 1:30 a.m by the typical loud crowd coming in after a late night and then again at 2:30 a.m when a woman took a phone call out in the hallway. Let me repeat, she took a phone call. in the hallway. at 2:30 am! I just can’t even wrap my head around it. Was she afraid of waking whomever was in her room? So she opted to wake everyone else on the floor (including those in her room, I’m certain). I have to admit, I don’t stand for that particular brand of rudeness (I don’t sleep for it either, obviously) so. I bolted from bed and opened the door and told her mildly kindly to go back in her room, that it was 2:30 in the morning. You know what she did? She kept talking. So I repeated myself in case she hadn’t heard me. You know what she did? She kept talking. No etiquette at all. I always remind my kids on the elevator to keep quiet in the hallways. Why can’t adults grasp this as well? If you are an adult who talks in hotel hallways, shame on you. Don’t let the door slam either.

2. Someone else’s dirt:

Another trend we seem to be setting for ourselves is getting dirty rooms. Remember I said we are very choosy with where we stay.  I’m not talking about a truck stop. We’ll shell out the big bucks for nice accommodations, but lately even our trusted brand has been a bit suspect. A while back, the husband and I stayed in a boutique hotel a few towns over (I won’t name names, but I know most of my local friends have likely stayed there as well) and for some reason we ended up in one of the larger suites. We thought, “score!” However; upon turning in, I realized that it was extremely obvious that the bed had been made with dirty sheets. Hair. Hair everywhere. Barf! The front desk receptionist sent someone up with clean sheets, but no clean pillows. I guess they hadn’t thought that far ahead? I can’t think of anything worse than finding you’ve checked in to a dirty hotel room. Ick.

3. Ghosts:

Ok, I’m only slightly kidding, but how else do you explain the following paranormal activity? You know those curtains that open and close with the push of a button? One room we stayed in had these. Very tall windows were completely blacked out in less than a minute with just the click of a button and you assumed rest was soon on its way. However; this set seemed to have a mind of its own and at about 3 am the curtains clicked on and raised a few feet and then stopped. We found this strange, but went back to sleep. Then about an hour later, up the curtains went another few feet. By this point if I’d gotten past the loud noises in the hallway, there was no way I was going to go back to sleep with Casper sharing the room.

4: Pillows:

I know some people bring their own pillows when they travel. I’ve even heard of some people bringing their own cleaning supplies and cleaning the room upon arrival, but until my more recent excursions this seemed a bit over the top. So, you pillow toting travelers, I get you. You mean business when you sleep and the sorry excuse hoteliers provide as a headrest just won’t do. I can’t bring myself to pack my own pillow because I’m more concerned with the amount of germs that my pillowcase will absorb in the transition, but that’s my own problem. Combined with the fact that the temperature of hotel rooms seems to get locked in on fiery gates of hell and a pillow that although looks like a fluffy cloud will drop to paper thin in seconds, there is no way you’re going to find comfort in a hotel room with the pillows provided.

5: The TV guide:

Hotels are the worst!
Hotels are just the worst!

If I could operate a hotel remote by holding it with a pair of tweezers, trust me I would. Am I giving anyone the impression that I’m a germaphobe? But, aside from the fact that who knows who is doing who knows what and then touching the remote, lets talk about the tv guide. Remember back in the stone ages when you had to click through each station one at a time until you found what you wanted to watch? I do, but my kids don’t. You know what kids like? Instant gratification. If you can provide me with a button to open and close my curtains, why can’t you provide me with modern television? No parent finds it a breeze to be locked in hotel room where there is no space to play and very few toys (if you packed them), so when at a last ditch effort you throw out, “who wants to watch cartoons?!!?” You want results. Fast. You end up clicking the up/down button through 100 channels with no provided identity for 20 mins, while silently praying that the kids don’t catch a glimpse of Spongebob (not in this house you don’t) or that whatever kid friendly show that might be on hasn’t decided to cut to commercial just as you whiz by. You then realize you’ve gone through the channels three times, you’ve pulled all your hair out, and the kids have started eating things off the floor, so you settle for Spongebob and say another prayer that the kids brains don’t actually turn to mashed potatoes. Please someone fix this first world problem.

Those are my reasons hotels are the worst.  What do you think? Have you ever had a really bad hotel experience? I’d love to hear it!

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14 Comments

  1. Ah ah – I can totally relate to quite a few of your comments. So very true!

  2. Haha – this is funny! I’ve never thought of some of these. Air BnB all the way.

    1. jstauff10 says:

      Totally! I did an Airbnb with my kids last summer for two weeks and I was a little nervous about staying in someone else’s house. It was so delightful! We will be staying there again this summer and I will plan on many more in the future!

  3. These are relevant points and I agree with all of them. I am one who takes my own sheet when I travel though I don’t stay at luxury places.

    1. jstauff10 says:

      Well that’s one I hadn’t heard before! Lol. Thanks so much for sharing!

  4. Willow says:

    I stayed at cabin that had the TV installed way too high on the wall. It was ridiculous! Other than that I have had pretty decent experiences with hotels.

    1. jstauff10 says:

      Haha. As someone who is either too picky or likes design…I can see why that would be a complete outrage!

  5. We have decided to swear off hotels and really concentrate on AirBnBs and so far– LOVE! We have even tried AirBnBs overseas and much better experience than hotels. Not to mention you get more for your money. So…hotels for us might be a thing of the past, for now at least.

    Thrifting Diva
    http://www.thriftingdiva.com

    1. jstauff10 says:

      I’m with you! If I could be an Airbnb affiliate, I so would! I was really worried about having someone else’s mess around before I did my first one, but I was so pleased with the experience and I’ll be doing it more and more.

  6. Haha I loveee a good hotel stay but we’ve all had some crappy ones in the past! I have another gripe – no plug sockets next to the bed. UMM?! This always drives me crazy.

    http://www.euriental.com

    1. jstauff10 says:

      Ha! More first world problems, huh?

  7. Your 2:30am phone call made me laugh. This past summer we were away for a softball tournament and the night before the championship game the fire alarm went off at 3:30 in the morning. Reason it went off remains unknown all though we suspect someone was smoking in their room.

    Or the time on vacation! Vacation of all times! My son was coming out of a hallway bathroom near the pool. The door was broken and it smashed his finger. Trip to E.R., stitches, broken bone, and lacerated finger! Only thing to do at that point was go home!

    I’ve never been a big fan of hotels….just to many scenarios of things going wrong.

    1. jstauff10 says:

      Oh no! Poor guy! My kids love hotels and my little guy always asks when we are going to go back to our house in ___. He thinks we lived there, lol.

  8. Lol! This made me laugh, and we have stayed at some doozies over the years. Thanks for the giggle!

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